Thinking back on all the times I asked for help. Hiring a virtual assistant to help with the day-to-day of my growing business, surveying clients for feedback and ideas, reaching out to family to help lighten my load in caring for my grandpa and talking to my girlfriends whenever I’m super emotional (because there’s nothing worse than sitting through brunch on the verge of tears and fake smiling through endless mimosas.) Asking for help in those situations wasn’t easy but the end result was different than I imagined. I don’t believe in not being good at asking for help as much as I think we’re just not comfortable doing it. However, there are so many good things that happen when you reach out, and asking for help isn’t always all about you (that’s the best part!).

5 Good Things That Happen When You Ask for Help –

1. You realize you were never alone.
Needing help can feel isolating and make you resentful of people who seem to have it all together while you’re crumbling under pressure. But how will people know you’re struggling if you don’t speak up? When you do, you realize you were never alone because people in your circle are willing to lend a hand however they can.

2. You help others.
We all want to live a life of purpose and significance. Servings others is one of the best ways to live on purpose…this is why asking for help isn’t all about you. We like to think our loved ones can read our minds and should know when we’re struggling, but unless we ask, our needs aren’t always so obvious. Or, they may notice but think we have it under control so they don’t press the issue. Either way, we’re all worse off because while we’re struggling, our friend is sitting on gifts, time or talent they can share with us. Accepting help helps others live out their purpose and learn more about themselves, too.

The virtual assistant I hired years ago is a prime example. Monique found me on Craigslist when I was in dire need of some admin help for my personal training business. She quickly turned into my business coach and friend and we’re still working together almost 5 years later. We’ve actually been brainstorming a business venture together! Monique says I was the catalyst for her expanding her services. All from that simple ad I put out asking for help. Know this – asking for help helps the helper, too.

3. You can work more on your situation and less in it.
One of the best pieces of business advice I got early on was to make sure I was spending time working on my business and not just in it. When you’re in it, you can’t see the bigger picture and make necessary changes. The same is true for life in general. You tend to do the same things the same ways over and over because you’re too deep in the situation to get the full picture. When you get help and step back, you see things more clearly. When you can see things more clearly, you can move forward differently.

4. You show your true self.
We’re all a little messy, we all overthink things and no one has it all together. And that’s ok! Asking for help is scary because it reveals our fears and insecurities, messiness and hang-ups but through all of that, you show your true self. The more of you you show, the more you attract the right people into your life and the more you learn about yourself. That’s a win-win!

5. You save time and money.
This might sound like a no-brainer, but asking for help can save you a lot of time and money. When you hired movers instead of doing it on your own (again). When you hired an expert to handle the graphic design for your company instead of staying up late to watch hours of tutorials on how to color code in InDesign. When you got a sitter so you could run errands in half the time. Just sayin’!

It’s normal to avoid asking for help because you don’t want to be a burden or look weak. When you realize the positives of asking outweigh the negatives of what it might do to your ego, it’s easier to reach out.

If you’re still struggling, try this –

  • Think of some areas of your life where you need the most help.
  • Think of people you trust to help you in those areas.
  • Try to match those people to the skills they have that could help you.
  • Ask.

Oh, and the next time someone offers to help you, say exactly what you need help with and take him or her up on the offer.